by Tom Morgan | Mar 14, 2021 | Health
Have you ever felt frustrated with the amount of thoughts that your mind is throwing at you, especially when you’re already feeling stressed or overwhelmed? It’s like an unruly roommate that you can’t get rid of. The noise never seems to stop.
This can be distracting at best. At worst, it can undermine your confidence and optimism.
While it isn’t possible to stop your mental chatter completely, there is plenty that you can do to tame it.
Keep these techniques in mind when you need an escape from your mental chatter:
1. Try using 5-4-3-2-1. When the noise in your head won’t seem to stop, try 5-4-3-2-1. This little exercise will get you out of your head and focused on your environment.
● Look around your environment and describe five things you see. For example: “I see a pair of shoes. They are made of brown leather, have a low heel, and rubber soles. They look old.” It’s easy to find five things you see, but the remainder of the exercise is a little more challenging.
● Describe four things you hear. “In the distance, I can hear car horns honking.” Really focus your attention on the noises you can hear and fully experience them.
● Describe three things you feel. It could be the cool breeze blowing over your skin, the firm chair underneath you, or the pain in your elbow.
● Describe two things you smell. You might have to really concentrate to come up with two.
● Tell yourself one thing you like about yourself. By the time you’ve finished all five parts of this exercise, your focus will be in the present instead of on the noise in your head.
2. Avoid engaging with your mental chatter. Your brain is going to make noise. There’s no way to stop it completely. The key is to ignore it. View the chatter in your head as nonsense and let it go.
3. Learn to meditate. Meditation creates a lot of opportunities for dealing with mental noise, because there’s nothing to distract you from it. Learn how to meditate and spend some time each day meditating to calm your mind.
4. Write it out. Set aside time each day to write down the things you’re randomly thinking. It’s very cathartic and really works if you give it a chance. After 10-20 minutes, take the paper you’ve been writing on and destroy it.
5. Use affirmations. Affirmations can improve your life. They also crowd out the noise. When the noise starts, use an affirmation to keep your mind occupied on thoughts that you want.
● Have a list of affirmations ready to go. Pick one and use it when necessary.
6. Use a mantra. Using a mantra is the same idea as using an affirmation. Your mantra could just be a meaningless sound or something more significant. Drown out the noise!
7. Focus on your breathing. Put your attention on your breathing. This is convenient, because it’s always available to you.
8. Listen to music. Playing music in the background while you work can help to keep in the internal voices at bay. Be careful that you don’t listen to something so distracting that you can’t concentrate on whatever it is that you’re doing. This might take some experimentation and practice.
Your brain creates thoughts. That’s what it’s designed to do. But there are solutions you can employ to reduce the noise. Attempting to eliminate your internal voice is a waste of time, but you can greatly reduce the noise and avoid engaging with it.
Just because your permanent roommate decides to speak doesn’t mean you have to listen! Practice these methods to reduce or prevent an overabundance of thoughts that you don’t want.
by Tom Morgan | Mar 14, 2021 | Self Awareness
Do you put the rest of your plans on hold when you start a new relationship? It’s a common pattern that could be interfering with your happiness and ability to find love.
It’s natural to be excited about a new romance. You want to spend each day together, and you start dreaming about your future. Before you know it, you lose track of your own identity and neglect your family and friends.
Learn how to stay grounded in reality when you feel like you’re falling in love. Try these tips for staying true to yourself as you welcome a new partner into your life.
Steps to Take Yourself:
1. Love yourself. You’re less likely to lose yourself in a relationship if you already value who you are. Increase your self-awareness and self-esteem by living mindfully and making choices that align with your core values.
2. Continue socializing. Keep spending time with family and friends. Visit your parents and schedule standing coffee dates with your pals. Encourage your new love interest to do the same. Your relationship will be stronger if you avoid placing excessive demands on each other.
3. Pursue your interests. You can love each other even if you prefer different kinds of music and restaurants. Carry on with your hobbies and passion projects. Go kayaking while your significant other volunteers for a political campaign.
4. Concentrate at work. Your performance may suffer if you spend too much time texting or fantasizing about your future children. Plan your workday and complete your tasks.
5. Set individual goals. Ensure that your life has a purpose bigger than any single relationship. Think about your spiritual development and the legacy you want to create.
6. Maintain boundaries. Honor your own needs. Explain how you want to be treated and let others know the consequences for exceeding your limits.
7. Spend time alone. You’ll probably make wiser decisions about relationships if you can enjoy your own company. Stay home one evening a week. Enjoy some solo activities each weekend. Give yourself a few spa treatments or read a long novel.
8. Consider counseling. Childhood experiences and other factors may interfere with your ability to find the love you deserve. If you need more help, talk with a therapist who specializes in relationships.
Steps to Take with Your Significant Other:
1. Slow down. Resist the urge to spend every moment together after a promising first date. Get to know each other gradually. Put off making any major decisions until your relationship is on firmer ground.
2. Listen closely. Your date may be wonderful, but they have weaknesses and quirks just like the rest of humanity. Pay attention to the evidence. Discuss important issues like how you feel about parenting and managing money.
3. Expect conflict. New couples sometimes avoid any subjects that could undermine their infatuation. In reality, your relationship is more likely to thrive if you learn to work out your differences with kindness and respect.
4. Coordinate communications. How many phone calls a day are you comfortable with? Negotiate a schedule that makes you both feel connected without becoming overwhelmed.
5. Seek balance. Relationships are rarely completely equal. One partner may love the other more or have more influence. However, you can strive for reciprocity and mutual support. Divide chores and other responsibilities. Pool your strengths and appreciate the contributions that you both make to your life together.
Holding on to your individuality creates a stronger foundation for love and intimacy. You can be yourself while being part of a couple. Your life will be fuller, and your relationships will be more satisfying.
by Tom Morgan | Mar 14, 2021 | Daily Affirmation
I grow wiser and happier with each passing year.
I take care of my health. I eat nutritious foods and watch my weight. I sleep well and manage stress. I work out on a regular basis. I listen to my doctor and follow their recommendations.
I stay connected. I keep in touch with family and friends. I talk about my experiences and feelings. I enjoy dinner parties and hiking trips. I nurture close and mutually supportive relationships.
I keep trying new things. I visit restaurants with unusual cuisines. I try out for a bocce ball league or start writing in a journal.
I continue learning. I read books and talk with others about their areas of expertise. I take classes at my local community college or online. I study foreign languages and ancient history.
I adapt to change. I accept losses as natural and inevitable. I am open to different ideas and modern technology.
I think positive. I count my blessings. I notice the opportunities that surround me.
I set new goals. I create challenges that motivate me.
I deepen my sense of purpose. I meditate and pray. I find a spiritual community where I can discuss my beliefs. I identify my strengths. I devote my time to activities that are meaningful for me. I experience greater peace and fulfillment.
Today, I make choices that help me to lead a long and healthy life. I embrace aging with comfort and confidence.
Self-Reflection Questions:
1. If there were a fountain of youth, would I want to drink from it?
2. How do mass media messages about aging affect the way I see myself?
3. What is one thing I appreciate more as I grow older?
