by Tom Morgan | Mar 8, 2021 | Self Awareness
Judging others isn’t just a diversion. It’s toxic to you and everyone around you. Judging others is similar to gossiping. It makes others think less of you. You’ll also find that the harder you are on other people, the harder you’ll be toward yourself.
Judging others is a way of controlling your environment, but the negative repercussions make it a poor life strategy.
What do you gain by judging others?
See the consequences of judging others:
1. It’s a huge waste of time. Judging others accomplishes nothing. You could spend that time exercising, reading, listening to music, supporting a friend, or taking a nap.
2. People don’t trust you. If you’re informing others around you of your negative judgements, they won’t trust you in the future. They know it’s only a matter of time before you judge them, too.
● Do you like to be around negative people? Do you trust them?
3. It makes you look bad. It’s poor form to criticize others behind their back. Even if you’re complaining about the quality of someone’s lawn, it’s still being negative and unpleasant. Well-adjusted people avoid spontaneously spouting negative opinions.
4. You open yourself up to judgement from others. When you judge people, they feel justified in judging you, too. Interestingly, you probably wouldn’t appreciate that very much! You’re likely to be treated in the same way you treat others.
5. Judging others negatively impacts your mood. You don’t feel better for long after you judge someone else. You’re acting on a negative impulse, which leads to a negative outcome and you carry that with you wherever you go.
6. You’re really just trying to protect your ego. The primary reason for judging others is elevating yourself. It’s easier to drag someone else down than it is to put in the work to make yourself a better person. Spend your time enhancing your life, rather than trying to bring others down.
7. Being hard on others is also being hard on yourself. Being critical of others leads to being critical of yourself. Your brain has a hard time distinguishing between being critical of other people and being critical of yourself. It will look for things to criticize if that’s what you teach it to do.
8. Judgement can be a form of selfishness. We tend to dislike those that have things we want but don’t have. We want it for ourselves, and we don’t want others to have it. This is because it shines a light on the fact that we’ve failed to attain it. Let others enjoy the rewards of their hard work.
9. You’re avoiding reality. Many of the things you dislike in others are things that you dislike about yourself. It’s easier to project these negative qualities out onto other people and acknowledge them at a distance. It’s a way of hiding from yourself.
Judging others hurts you more than it hurts them.
It damages your standing with other people. You make enemies. You think less of yourself. And it’s all negative.
Rather than judge other people, make the necessary changes to enhance the aspects of your life that you’re dissatisfied with. Focus on positive changes to yourself and your own life, and life will become more fulfilling for you.
by Tom Morgan | Mar 8, 2021 | Daily Affirmation
I love to work out.
I create interesting challenges for myself. I set goals for building my strength, increasing my flexibility, and conditioning my heart. I track my progress. I savor the satisfaction of my achievements. I give myself rewards like healthy desserts and new shoes.
I vary my routines. Mixing things up helps me to avoid boredom. I alternate between pilates classes and rock-climbing sessions. I read fitness books and watch videos to gather new ideas.
I socialize with others. I surround myself with support. I invite family and friends to join me. Having a workout buddy provides company and makes me feel more accountable. I participate in online forums where I can share encouragement and helpful feedback.
I connect with nature. Running requires less effort when I have a river view.
I dance and sing. I play music that lifts my spirits and makes me want to move.
I buy some toys. I keep simple equipment at home and bring it with me on business trips. I skip rope and shimmy around with a hula hoop.
I play games. I use apps that let me workout with friends while I collect points or run from zombies. I practice my favorite sports or try pickleball for the first time.
I cultivate a positive body image. I look at exercise as something positive I do for myself. I am grateful for my body and how hard it works. I want to keep it strong and fit.
Today, I enjoy myself while I work out. I have so much fun that I forget I am exercising.
Self-Reflection Questions:
1. What do I like about working out?
2. How does my diet affect how I feel about exercising?
3. What is one new workout I want to try?
by Tom Morgan | Mar 8, 2021 | Confidence
Are there times when you’ve been working hard to make progress on something or just get it completed, yet despite your best efforts, it just isn’t going well, and you feel frustrated and disappointed about that?
It can be like you’re running through mud, using up all your energy, but you’re not getting very far at all!
Experiencing these kinds of disappointments can be really stressful, especially if you are up against a time constraint.
You can very easily become totally despondent, and then despair creeps in. The good news is, however, that you can get past this. You will get past it, as others have done before you.
The project that you’ve been working on likely isn’t the issue. Maybe you were in line for a promotion. You thought you would get it but didn’t. Maybe you are trying to explore the possibilities of a completely new career, but after all the effort expended, you still have no idea what kind of new career might be best for you.
This is just part of life, and pretty much everyone has been in this place before. Some of us have been there many times. When we get in these situations, it’s important to find different ways to move us over, under, around, or through them and not spend too much time dwelling on them.
To overcome your frustration and disappointment, you only need to spend enough time thinking about your circumstances to get a good handle on the situation. Then, take action and create a change in the way you are seeing it.
The fastest and most effective way of changing anything is to make a decision and take action.
Consider these actions that others have done to make a positive difference:
1. Reframe it. Reframe the situation and it takes on a whole new perspective. View the frustration that you are experiencing as a good thing because frustration means that you are just about to learn something.
● Look for the lesson. Once you’ve found it, you will never need to go back there again.
2. Change your routine. Your daily routine has a bigger impact on the way you show up in life than you think. If you find yourself in a mind-set that is not supporting you, change your routine.
● Go for a run, ride your bike, or go for a walk. Go somewhere different, go in the rain. Get close to nature. Do something exhilarating.
● Your whole demeanor will change for the better in 60 minutes or less and so will the challenge that you are wrestling with.
3. Seek encouragement and Inspiration. Who do you know who can inspire you? Encourage you? Share some life wisdom with you? We all have someone we respect, trust, and enjoy talking over difficult situations with.
● Oftentimes, just explaining the situation can shine a light on a solution or a strategy that can resolve a difficult issue.
4. Adjust your attitude. It’s not what happens to you, it’s what you do about it that matters. Acknowledge that you are in a place of frustration and disappointment, but also acknowledge that you can and will get past it. Other people have, and so will you.
● There is nothing that is going to be insurmountable. Start from the viewpoint that there is a solution here, and you will find it.
5. Be open to new ideas. Getting good at anything is easiest done by learning from other people’s experiences. Always be open to new ideas, different ways of seeing things, additional strategies, and especially new attitudes.
● More often than not, it’s not the situation or circumstance that is the root of the issue. It’s either the way we are approaching it or the way we are perceiving it.
● If someone else has a methodology for resolving these issues, don’t reinvent the wheel, but follow in their footsteps.
6. Expect a positive outcome. If you adopt a perspective of positive expectancy, whereby you know that it doesn’t matter what happens, and you’re absolutely certain that everything will work out perfectly, more often than not, it really does.
● If you can get this one into your daily affirmations, everything will change for the better.
Don’t let frustration and disappointment rule over you. Use these tips to get past them and move forward toward the future you want!
